Don't go only by the appearance of people...JTJ Certified!!
A lady in a faded grey dress and her husband, dressed in a homespun suit walked in timidly without an appointment into the Harvard University President's outer office.
The secretary could tell in a moment that such backwoods, country hicks had no business at Harvard and probably didn't even deserve to be in Harvard.
'We want to see the President,' the man said softly. 'He'll be busy all day,' the secretary snapped. 'We'll wait,' the lady replied.
For hours the secretary ignored them, hoping that the couple would finally become discouraged and go away.
They didn't and the secretary grew frustrated and finally decided to disturb the president.' Maybe if you see them for a few minutes, they'll leave,' she said to him.
The President, stern faced and with dignity, strutted toward the couple.
The lady told him, 'We had a son who attended Harvard for one year. He loved Harvard. He was happy here. But about a year ago, he was accidentally killed.
My husband and I would like to erect a memorial to him, somewhere on campus.' The president wasn't touched....
He was shocked. 'Madam,' he said, gruffly, 'we can't put up a statue for every person who attended Harvard and died. If we did, this place would look like a cemetery.
' 'Oh, no,' the lady explained quickly. 'We don't want to erect a statue. We thought we would like to give a building to Harvard.'
The president rolled his eyes. He glanced at the gingham dress and homespun suit, and then exclaimed, 'A building!
Do you have any earthly idea how much a building costs? We have over seven and a half million dollars in the physical buildings here at Harvard.
' For a moment the lady was silent. The president was pleased. Maybe he! could get rid of them now.
The lady turned to her husband and said quietly, 'Is that all it costs to start a university? Why don't we just start our own?'
Her husband nodded.
The president's face wilted in confusion and bewilderment.
Mr. and Mrs. Leland Stanford got up and walked away, traveling to Palo Alto, California where they established the University that bears their name? Stanford University, a memorial to a son that Harvard no longer cared about.
Most of the time we judge people by their outer appearance, which can be misleading. And in this impression only we tend to treat people badly by thinking they can do nothing for us thus we tend to lose our potential good friends, employees or customers.
Small people talk about others,
Average people talk about things,
Great people talk about ideas.
have u read this
DAD"S BLESSINGS
A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer's showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.
As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his graduation, his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautifully wrapped gift box. Curious, but somewhat disappointed, the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible, with the young man's name embossed in gold. Angry, he raised his voice to his father and said "With all your money, you give me a Bible?" and stormed out of the house, leaving the Bible.
Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realized his father was very old, and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since that graduation day. Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.
When he arrived at his father's house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search through his father's important papers and saw the still new Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. And as he did, a car key dropped from the back of the Bible. It had a tag with the dealer's name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words PAID IN FULL.
How many times do we miss Spirit's blessings and answers to our prayers because they do not arrive exactly as we have expected?
Sand & Stone
Two friends were walking through the desert. During some point of the journey, they had an argument and one friend slapped the other one in the face.
The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything, wrote in the sand:
'Today my best friend slapped me in the face.'
They kept on walking until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a bath. The one who had been slapped got stuck in the mire and started drowning, but the friend saved him.
After he recovered from the near drowning, he wrote on a stone:
'Today my best friend saved my life.'
The friend who had slapped and saved his best friend asked him, 'After I hurt you, you wrote in the sand and now, you write on a stone, why?'
The friend replied, 'When someone hurts us we should write it down in sand, where winds of forgiveness can erase it away. But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it.'
Learn to write your hurts in the sand and to carve your benefits in stone.
They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.
Do not value the things you have in your life, but value who you have in your life!
The Beggar King
Once there was a time, according to legend, when a king who had no son ruled Ireland. The king sent out his couriers to post notices in all the towns of his realm. The notices advised that every qualified young man should apply for an interview with the king as a possible successor to the throne. However, all such candidates must have these two qualifications: They must (1) love God and (2) love their fellow human beings.
The Young man about whom this legend centers saw a notice and reflected that he loved God and, also, his neighbors. One thing stopped him; he was so poor that he had no clothes that would be presentable in the sight of the king. Nor did he have the funds to buy provisions for the long journey to the castle. Therefore, the young man begged here, and borrowed there, finally managing to scrounge enough money for the appropriate clothes and the necessary supplies.
Properly attired and well suited, the young man set out on his quest, and had almost completed the journey when he came upon a poor beggar by the side of the road. The beggar sat trembling, clad only in tattered rags. His extended arms pleaded for help. His weak voice croaked, "I'm hungry and cold. Please help me... please?"
The young man was so moved by the beggar's need that he immediately stripped off his new clothes and put on the tattered threads of the beggar. Without a second thought, he gave the beggar all his provision as well. Then, somewhat hesitantly, he continued his journey to the castle dressed in the rags of the beggar, lacking provisions for his return trek home. Upon his arrival at the castle, a king's attendant showed him in to the great hall. After a brief respite to clean off the journey's grime, he was finally admitted to the throne room of the king.
The young man bowed low before his majesty. When he raised his eyes, he gaped in astonishment. "You... it's you! You're the beggar by the side of the road."
"Yes," the king replied with a twinkle, "I was that beggar."
"But...bu...bu... you are not really a beggar. You are the king for real. Well, then, why did you do this to me?" the young man stammered after gaining more of his composure.
"Because I had to find out if you genuinely love God and your fellow human beings," said the king. "I knew that if I came to you as king, you would have been impressed by my gem-encrusted golden crown and my royal robes. You would have done anything I asked of you because of my regal character. However, that way I would never have known what is truly in your heart. Therefore, I used a ruse. I came to you as a beggar with no claims on you except for the love in your hear. Moreover, I discovered that you sincerely do love God and your fellow human beings. You will be my successor," promised the king. "You will inherit my kingdom."
EIGHT LIES OF A MOTHER - Inspiring one ...
The story began when I was a child; I was born as a son of a poor family. Even for eating, we often got lack of food. Whenever the time for eating, mother often gave me her portion of rice. While she was removing her rice into my bowl, she would say 'Eat this rice, son. I'm not hungry'.
That was Mother's First Lie
When I was getting to grow up, the persevering mother gave her spare time for fishing in a river near our house, she hoped that from the fishes she got, she could gave me a little bit nutritious food for my growth. After fishing, she would cook the fishes to be a fresh fish soup, which raised my appetite. While I was eating the soup, mother would sit beside me and eat the rest meat of fish, which was still on the bone of the fish I ate. My heart was touched when I saw it. I then used my chopstick and gave the other fish to her. But she immediately refused it and said 'Eat this fish, son. I don't really like fish.'
That was Mother's Second Lie.
Then, when I was in Junior High School, to fund my study, mother went to an economic enterprise to bring some used-matches boxes that would be stuck in. It gave her some money for covering our needs. As the winter came, I woke up from my sleep and looked at my mother who was still awoke, supported by a little candlelight and within her perseverance she continued the work of sticking some used-matches box. I said, 'Mother, go to sleep, it's late, tomorrow morning you still have to go for work. ' Mother smiled and said 'Go to sleep, dear. I'm not tired.'
That was Mother's Third Lie.
At the time of final term, mother asked for a leave from her work in order to accompany me. While the daytime was coming and the heat of the sun was starting to shine, the strong and persevering mother waited for me under the heat of the sun's shine for several hours. As the bell rang, which indicated that the final exam had finished, mother immediately welcomed me and poured me a glass of tea that she had prepared before in a cold bottle. The very thick tea was not as thick as my mother's love, which was much thicker. Seeing my mother covering with perspiration, I at once gave her my glass and asked her to drink too. Mother said 'Drink, son. I'm not thirsty!'.
That was Mother's Fourth Lie.
After the death of my father because of illness, my poor mother had to play her role as a single parent. By held on her former job, she had to fund our needs alone. Our family's life was more complicated. No days without sufferance. Seeing our family's condition that was getting worse, there was a nice uncle who lived near my house came to help us, either in a big problem and a small problem. Our other neighbors who lived next to us saw that our family's life was so unfortunate, they often advised my mother to marry again. But mother, who was stubborn, didn't care to their advice, she said 'I don't need love.'
That was Mother's Fifth Lie.
After I had finished my study and then got a job, it was the time for my old mother to retire. But she didn't want to; she was sincere to go to the marketplace every morning, just to sell some vegetable for fulfilling her needs. I, who worked in the other city, often sent her some money to help her in fulfilling her needs, but she was stubborn for not accepting the money. She even sent the money back to me. She said 'I have enough money.'
That was Mother's Sixth Lie.
After graduated from Bachelor Degree, I then continued my study to Master Degree. I took the degree, which was funded by a company through a scholarship program, from a famous University in America . I finally worked in the company. Within a quite high salary, I intended to take my mother to enjoy her life in America . But my lovely mother didn't want to bother her son, she said to me 'I'm not used to.'
That was Mother's Seventh Lie.
After entering her old age, mother got a flank cancer and had to be hospitalized. I, who lived in miles away and across the ocean, directly went home to visit my dearest mother. She lied down in weakness on her bed after having an operation. Mother, who looked so old, was staring at me in deep yearn. She tried to spread her smile on her face; even it looked so stiff because of the disease she held out. It was clear enough to see how the disease broke my mother's body, thus she looked so weak and thin. I stared at my mother within tears flowing on my face. My heart was hurt, so hurt, seeing my mother on that condition. But mother, with her strength, said 'Don't cry, my dear. I'm not in pain.'
That was Mother's Eight Lie.
After saying her eighth lie, She closed her eyes forever!
On Having A Mentor A Lesson from Alexander The Great: Asoka Selvarajah, Ph.D
In a recent biography of Alexander the Great, the author, in exploring Alexander's motivations and driving forces, makes some fascinating observations.
It would seem that Alexander was a devoted reader of Homer's great epic poems, The Odyssey and the Iliad; particularly the latter. The Iliad deals with Ancient Greek ideals of hero, warfare and glory in the context of the war against the city of Troy.
Alexander, it would seem, read these stories from an early age and imagined himself to be in the same line as the classic Greek heroes of yesteryear. He was quite obsessive about this poem epic and could recite large sections of it by heart. In fact, he had a special copy made for himself and took it with him on his exploits and conquests of two million square miles of the ancient world.
In particular, his great hero was Achilles, from whom he was said to be a direct descendant through his mother. Throughout his life, Alexander engaged in a sort of rivalry with his hero and sought to outdo Achilles' exploits by his own. He also encouraged comparison between himself and Achilles.
All of this is fascinating from a number of aspects. First and foremost, it is yet another proof - as is repeatedly evidenced by all great achievers in life - that the mind creates reality. In other words, what you dwell upon becomes your reality.
Dwelling on a fictional account of heroism and conquest made one man realize that reality in his own life and conquer most of the known world. This was his role model and what he continually fantasized becoming.
Secondly, in so identifying with Achilles, he effectively made him a mentor. This is another common feature of highly successful people. They all have someone they turn to, or seek to emulate.
Usually, that person is alive. Even Bill Gates has a mentor. His name is Warren Buffett; one of the greatest living stock market investors and, like Bill Gates, a multi-billionaire. So if you seek excellence in a particular field, the first thing to do is to try to find someone who already excels in it and try to make their acquaintance and ask that person to be your mentor.
If that person is inaccessible (for now), then read their writings, watch their videos and imagine yourself doing the same. Ask yourself what that person would do in each situation. Imagine being that person.
However, if you have no living mentor who will do, you can create one in your imagination as Alexander must have done with Achilles. You can imagine your mentor performing at the level of excellence you desire and then, as Alexander the Great must have done, step into that person's shoes and imagine it is you excelling and leaving the rest of the world behind.
It is so striking that all highly successful people do a huge amount of imagining and daydreaming. Most of us do not because we feel it is a waste of time and achieves nothing. Strangely, enough, it could be the most important thing we ever do. Without it, all our other "practical" efforts could go for nothing.
In conclusion, (a) seek a mentor in your field of choice - either living, dead or imagined - and seek to emulate that person's excellence; (b) imagine and visualize your future vividly and continually.
Imagine even the utterly impossible, as Alexander the Great did. If you do, who knows what might happen? Your vision of what is possible might just have to expand a lot to fit a much grander design!
mullah nasiriddin
Once a renowned philosopher and moralist was traveling through Nasruddin's village when he asked him where there was a good place to eat. He suggested a place and the scholar, hungry for conversation, invited Mullah Nasruddin to join him. Much obliged, Mullah Nasruddin accompanied the scholar to a nearby restaurant, where they asked the waiter about the special of the day.
- Fish! Fresh Fish! replied the waiter.
- Bring us two, they answered.
A few minutes later, the waiter brought out a large platter with two cooked fish on it, one of which was quite a bit smaller than the other. Without hesitating, Mullah Nasruddin cooked the larger of the fish and put in on his plate.
The scholar, giving Mullah Nasruddin a look of intense disbelief, proceed to tell him that what he did was not only blatantly selfish, but that it violated the principles of almost every known moral, religious, and ethical system. Mullah Nasruddin calmly listened to the philosopher's extempore lecture patiently, and when he had finally exhausted his resources, Mullah Nasruddin said,
- Well, Sir, what would you have done?
- I, being a conscientious human, would have taken the smaller fish for myself.
- And here you are, Mullah Nasruddin said, and placed the smaller fish on the gentleman's plate.
Donkey in the Well
One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well.
The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do.
Finally he decided the animal was old, hat the well needed to be covered anyway and that it just wasn't worth retrieving the donkey.
So he invited all his neighbours to come over and help him.
They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well.
At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly.
Then, to everyone's amazement, he quietened down.
A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well and was astonished at what he saw.
With every shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.
As the farmer's neighbours continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up.
Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and trotted off !
Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up.
Ensure, Assure, Insure
Barbara of the Bonneville Power Administration in Vancouver, Washington, asked me to write about ensure, assure, and insure. I am happy to write from the U.S. perspective, and I am hoping my friends across the oceans and borders will enlighten us about any differences.
Here is an illustration with all three words:
I assure you that Morgan did ensure that the company will insure both vehicles.
Here are quick definitions based on my favorite U.S. style guides:
Ensure = make certain.
Insure = protect against financial loss.
Assure = promise, give confidence to.
The noun form of insure is insurance. Outside the insurance industry, some people use insure and ensure interchangeably, but careful writers don't.
Let's see if we agree which word goes in each blank:
- Please _____ that this does not happen again.
- You ought to _____ the painting for $24,000.
- Please _____ Mrs. Rio that her coat will be delivered to her today.
- How can I _____ that the package will arrive by tomorrow?
- I _____ you that the figures are correct.
Before I give you my answers, remember my sample sentence with all three words? Please forget it. It would never be wise to use all three words in one sentence. Doing so would dizzy your readers rather than focusing them on your meaning.
Here are my answers for the blanks above: 1. ensure, 2. insure, 3. assure, 4. ensure, 5. assure.
Please let me know what works in Britain, Australia, Canada, and other lovely places.
Are You a Bucket-Filler or a Dipper?
You have heard of the cup that overflowed. This is a story of a bucket that is like the cup, only larger, it is an invisible bucket. Everyone has one. It determines how we feel about ourselves, about others, and how we get along with people. Have you ever experienced a series of very favorable things, which made you want to be good to people for a week? At that time, your bucket was full.
Many things that happen can fill a bucket. When a person speaks to you, recognizing you as a human being, your bucket is filled a little. Even more if he calls you by name, especially if it is the name you like to be called. If he compliments you on your dress or on a job well done, the level in your bucket goes up still higher. There must be a million ways to raise the level in another's bucket. Writing a friendly letter, remembering something that is special to him, knowing the names of his children, expressing sympathy for his loss, giving him a hand when his work is heavy, taking time for conversation, or, perhaps more important, listing to him.
When one's bucket is full of this emotional support, one can express warmth and friendliness to people. But, remember, this is a theory about a bucket and a dipper. Other people have dippers and they can get their dippers in your bucket. This, too, can be done in a million ways.
Let us say I am at a dinner and inadvertently upset a glass of thick, sticky chocolate milk that spills over the tablecloth, on a lady's skirt, down onto the carpet. I am embarrassed. "Bright Eyes" across the table says, "You upset that glass of chocolate milk." I made a mistake, I know I did, and then he told me about it! He got his dipper in my bucket! Think of the times a person makes a mistake, feels terrible about it, only to have someone tell him about the known mistake ("Red pencil" mentality!)
Buckets are filled and buckets are emptied? Emptied many times because people do not really think about what are doing. When a person's bucket is emptied, he is very different than when it is full. You say to a person whose bucket is empty, "That is a pretty tie you have," and he may reply in a very irritated, defensive manner.
Although there is a limit to such an analogy, there are people who seem to have holes in their buckets. When a person has a hole in his bucket, he irritates lots of people by trying to get his dipper in their buckets. This is when he really needs somebody to pour it in his bucket because he keeps losing.
The story of our lives is the interplay of the bucket and the dipper. Everyone has both. The unyielding secret of the bucket and the dipper is that when you fill another's bucket it does not take anything out of your own bucket. The level in our own bucket gets higher when we fill another's, and, on the other hand, when we dip into another's bucket we do not fill our own ... we lose a little.
For a variety of reasons, people hesitate filling the bucket of another and consequently do not experience the fun, joy, happiness, fulfillment, and satisfaction connected with making another person happy. Some reasons for this hesitancy are that people think it sounds "fakey," or the other person will be suspicious of the motive, or it is "brown-nosing."
Therefore, let us put aside our dipper and resolve to touch someone's life in order to fill his or her bucket.
From the Heart of a Joyous Child
Dear Mommy and Daddy,
I write this letter to you in hopes that you will consider your approach to parenting me before I arrive. I am a joyous child. I thrive on love and respect, order and consistency. When I arrive, I will seem very small to you. Even though I do not look like an adult, please understand that I am a human being.
Even though I will not speak words to you, I will know you with my heart. I will feel all your feelings, absorb your thoughts. I will come to know you more than you may know yourself. Do not be misled by my silence. I am open, growing and learning more rapidly than you can imagine.
I will make imprints of all that I see, so please give me beauty to rest my eyes upon. I will record all that I hear, so please give me sweet music and language that tells me how much I am loved. Give me silence to rest my ears. I will absorb all that I feel, so please wrap our life in love.
I am waiting patiently to be with you. I am so happy to have the opportunity to be alive. Maybe when you see me you will remember how precious life is too!
Your joyous child
Perspective
They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.
On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, 'How was the
trip?'
'It was great, Dad.'
'Did you see how poor people live?' the father asked.
'Oh yeah,' said the son.
'So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?' asked the father
The son answered:
'I saw that we have one dog and they had four.
We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end.
We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.
Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.
We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.
We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.
We buy our food, but they grow theirs.
We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them.'
The boy's father was speechless.
Then his son added, 'Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are.'
Isn't perspective a wonderful thing?
Makes you wonder what would happen if we all gave thanks for everything we have, instead of worrying about what we don't have.
Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!
Enough Is Enough
What does it take to make you happy?
To the barefoot man, happiness is a pair of old shoes.
To the man with old shoes, it's a pair of new shoes.
To the man with new shoes, it's more stylish shoes.
And, of course, the fellow with no feet would be happy being barefoot.
This leads to the ancient insight: If you want to be happy, count your blessings, not your burdens.
Yet in our modern world where we're continually exposed to endless increments of more and better - others with more money, better TVs, and bigger houses - this is very difficult.
For some people, the pleasure of having something good is drained as soon as they see someone else with something better.
A life consumed with unfulfilled wants is an affliction.
The antidote is understanding the concept of "enough."
Start by thinking more clearly about the difference between your needs and your wants, between sufficiency and abundance.
Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with wanting more and striving to fill our lives with things and experiences that give us pleasure, so long as we don't believe we need whatever we want.
When we think we need what we really only want, we make our desires preconditions to happiness, thereby diminishing our ability to appreciate and enjoy what we do have.
It's easy to think that happiness is achieved by getting what we want, when it's really a matter of wanting what we get.
In the end, enough is enough.
What is Excellence?
Where are you going to keep the idol?
When the idol will be 20 feet away from the eyes of the beholder,
The desire to excel should be exclusive of the fact whether someone
Mullah nasiriddin
One day a visitor came to Mullah Nasruddin with a question.
- Mullah Nasruddin, the place that we humans come from and the place that we go to, what is it like?
- Oh, said Mullah Nasruddin, it is a very frightening place.
- Why do you say that? the visitor asked.
- Well, when we come from there as babies, we are crying, and when somebody has to go there, everybody cries.
Stuck In The Mud
Pain comes and it goes. It is just one component to the grand cycle of life. And when experienced as such, pain can serve as an important teacher. It is when we get stuck in our pain that it becomes detrimental to our well-being and development. If you notice that you feel closed-off, resentful, heavy-hearted, or that you try very hard to avoid being hurt again, there may be a part of you that is still stuck in pain.
We can get stuck in our pain for many reasons. As children, it was natural for us to cry, throw a tantrum, and let the experience move through us. By fully feeling our pain in this way, our emotions would wash us clean, leaving us open and available to new experiences. With age, though, we might have determined that expressing emotion was no longer appropriate, and so we developed a variety of coping strategies to deal with our discomfort. We may have learned to stuff our feelings down or to run away from them. Perhaps we began thinking that staying closed and unwilling to try new things would keep us safe from heartbreak, safe from rejection, and safe from failure. We may have even gotten so used to being in pain that the thought of being without it scares us. But, if we continue to hold onto it longer than necessary, we are expending a lot of energy that could instead be channeled into making our life experiences more positive.
If you notice that you are continually connecting with the same familiar patterns of pain, consider embracing your feelings and letting go of your hurt. Whether your pain is from childhood or from an experience last week, see if you can give it room to move. When it does, you will reconnect with a wonderful source of your own vital energy.
Disapproving Faces
It is not necessarily a pleasant experience, but there will be times in our lives when we come across people who do not like us. As we know, like attracts like, so usually when they don't like us it is because they are not like us. Rather than taking it personally, we can let them be who they are, accepting that each of us is allowed to have different perspectives and opinions. When we give others that freedom, we claim it for ourselves as well, releasing ourselves from the need for their approval so we can devote our energy toward more rewarding pursuits.
While approval from others is a nice feeling, when we come to depend on it we may lose our way on our own path. There are those who will not like us no matter what we do, but that doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with us. Each of us has our own filters built from our experiences over time. They may see in us something that is merely a projection of their understanding, but we have no control over the interpretations of others. The best we can do is to hope that the role we play in the script of their lives is helpful to them, and follow our own inner guidance with integrity.
As we reap the benefits of walking our perfect paths, we grow to appreciate the feeling of fully being ourselves. The need to have everyone like us will be replaced by the exhilaration of discovering that we are attracting like-minded individuals into our lives—people who like us because they understand and appreciate the truth of who we are. We free ourselves from trying to twist into shapes that will fit the spaces provided by others' limited understanding and gain a new sense of freedom, allowing us to expand into becoming exactly who we're meant to be. And in doing what we know to be right for us, we show others that they can do it too. Cocreating our lives with the universe and its energy of pure potential, we transcend limitations and empower ourselves to shine our unique light, fully and freely.
The Donkey Attitude .. GOOD ONE
One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey. Suatu hari keledai seorang petani jatuh ke dalam sumur. Binatang itu menangis pilu berjam-jam, sementara si petani mencoba memikirkan apa yang harus dia lakukan. Akhirnya ia memutuskan bahwa binatang itu sudah tua, dan sumurnya pun perlu ditutup, sehingga tidak perlu untuk mengangkat keledai itu keluar.
He invited all his neighbours to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.
Ia mengajak seluruh tetangganya untuk datang menolongnya. Mereka semua mengambil sekop dan mulai menimbun sumur dengan tanah. Mula-mula ketika si keledai menyadari apa yang sedang terjadi, ia menangis sejadi-jadinya. Kemudian, semua takjub ketika ia berhenti menangis.
A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.
Setelah memasukkan beberapa sekop tanah kemudian, si petani akhirnya melihat ke bawah sumur. Ia terkejut akan apa yang dilihatnya. Terhadap setiap sekop tanah yang menimpa punggungnya, si keledai melakukan sesuatu yang luar biasa. Ia mengibaskan badannya dan mengangkat badannya ke atas.
As the farmer's neighbours continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon,
everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!
Ketika para tetangga petani terus menyekop tanah ke atas tubuh binatang itu, ia mengibaskan badannya dan selalu mengangkat badannya ke atas. Dengan segera, semua orang takjub ketika keledai itu tiba di permukaan sumur, dan dengan gembira melangkah keluar!
MORAL :
Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of t he deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up.
HIKMAH :
Kehidupan akan selalu dipenuhi oleh berbagai macam persoalan. Seperti ceritera donkey diatas Trik untuk keluar dari sumur adalah dengan mengibaskan tanah itu dan mengangkat badannya ke atas. Setiap kesulitan yang kita hadapi adalah batu pijakan. Kita dapat keluar dari sumur yang paling dalam dengan cara tidak berhenti & tak pernah menyerah! Kibaskan & Mengangkat ke atas.
Remember the five simple rules to be happy:
1. Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.
2. Free your mind from worries - Most never happen.
3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less
what's really important in life
A professor teaches his students a lesson about what's really important in life.
When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember this story about a mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee...
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.
So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.
The professor! next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed. 'Now,' said the professor, as the laughter subsided, ' I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things-your God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions-things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car. The sand is everything else-the small stuff.
'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important.'
So, pay attention to the things that are most important. Take care of your health--cook with your kids!-- spend time with those you love.
There's always time to clean the house--it's a never ending job anyway :
Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.
Wondering what the coffee represents?
No matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple cups of coffee with a friend--or a soda if you're like me and don't drink coffee!! - :
Taking The Risk: Permission To Be Real
Most of us are familiar with the idea of keeping it real and have an intuitive sense about what that means. People who keep it real don’t hide behind a mask to keep themselves safe from their fear of how they might be perceived. They don’t present a false self in order to appear more perfect, more powerful, or more independent. People who keep it real present themselves as they truly are, the good parts and the parts most of us would rather hide, sharing their full selves with the people who are lucky enough to know them.
Being real in this way is not an easy thing to do as we live in a culture that often shows us images of physical and material perfection. As a result, we all want to look younger, thinner, wealthier, and more successful. We are rewarded externally when we succeed at this masquerade, but people who are real remind us that, internally, we suffer. Whenever we feel that who we are is not enough and that we need to be bigger, better, or more exciting, we send a message to ourselves that we are not enough. Meanwhile, people who are not trying to be something more than they are walk into a room and bring a feeling of ease, humor, and warmth with them. They acknowledge their wrinkles and laugh at their personal eccentricities without putting themselves down.
People like this inspire us to let go of our own defenses and relax for a moment in the truth of who we really are. In their presence, we feel safe enough to take off our masks and experience the freedom of not hiding behind a barrier. Those of us who were lucky enough to have a parent who was able to keep it real may find it easier to be that way ourselves. The rest of us may have to work a little harder to let go of our pretenses and share the beauty and humor of our real selves. Our reward for taking such a risk is that as we do, we will attract and inspire others, giving them the permission to be real too.
Stuck In The Mud: Staying In Pain
Pain comes and it goes. It is just one component to the grand cycle of life. And when experienced as such, pain can serve as an important teacher. It is when we get stuck in our pain that it becomes detrimental to our well-being and development. If you notice that you feel closed-off, resentful, heavy-hearted, or that you try very hard to avoid being hurt again, there may be a part of you that is still stuck in pain.
We can get stuck in our pain for many reasons. As children, it was natural for us to cry, throw a tantrum, and let the experience move through us. By fully feeling our pain in this way, our emotions would wash us clean, leaving us open and available to new experiences. With age, though, we might have determined that expressing emotion was no longer appropriate, and so we developed a variety of coping strategies to deal with our discomfort. We may have learned to stuff our feelings down or to run away from them. Perhaps we began thinking that staying closed and unwilling to try new things would keep us safe from heartbreak, safe from rejection, and safe from failure. We may have even gotten so used to being in pain that the thought of being without it scares us. But, if we continue to hold onto it longer than necessary, we are expending a lot of energy that could instead be channeled into making our life experiences more positive.
If you notice that you are continually connecting with the same familiar patterns of pain, consider embracing your feelings and letting go of your hurt. Whether your pain is from childhood or from an experience last week, see if you can give it room to move. When it does, you will reconnect with a wonderful source of your own vital energy.
Digging Up The Tree Of Ignorance: Asoka Selvarajah, Ph.D
Why do we fail to do the good that we know we should? Why do we fall below our own standards? Why do we try so hard to make progress in life and yet have little to really show for it?
In Yoga philosophy, the term AVIDYA is used to describe the condition that causes this tendency within us. It literally means "incorrect comprehension"; better known as ignorance. According to yoga teachings it is deeply rooted in our being through repeated habit. We know that any behavior, when repeated often enough, becomes almost instinctive. This is true to such an extent that we can even believe such actions to be outside of our conscious control. The misuse of this "anchoring procedure" is the foundation of avidya.
Examples include unjustified angry reactions to other people, chronic dependencies like alcohol or drugs, or self-sabotage just when we are about to make a life-changing breakthrough in some important area.
The subtle thing about avidya is that it hides itself. It only ever manifests as something else. Its symptoms are everywhere, but the cause itself remains concealed. We see it as "life", or the other person's fault, or some recurring self-destructive habit we can't control. The source itself remains concealed.
Avidya is like a deeply rooted tree with four thick branches. The first branch is called ASMITA, or ego. This is the part of us that seeks its own interests. It considers itself better than others, is bruised when it does not get its own way, and generally causes us to identify with this earthly body and the life it is living. It has no wider perspective than that.
The second branch is called RAGA and is best translated as Desire or Attachment. This is the part that constantly wants what it does not have. It desires what it does not really need and seeks to accumulate merely for the sake of it. It makes us unsatisfied and causes us to continually compare ourselves unfavorably with others. If we are wealthy, we are unhappy because somebody else is wealthier still. And so on......
The third branch is called DVESA or Refusal. This is like the recoil response. Whatever negative experiences we have had in life make us afraid of repeating them again in case the same result occurs. It can make us reject people, situations and possibilities that just might cause us pain again. In one person, it may be the fear of forming relationships with the opposite sex. In another, it may be a fear of public speaking as a result of negative childhood experiences.
The fourth and last branch on the tree of Avidya is called ABHINIVESA or Fear. These are specifically fears that are NOT caused by previous experience. For example, we may fear change, or growing old, or that we may lose everything we worked so hard to earn. In other words, things we may never have experienced before.
Avidya, in all its subtle forms, works within us constantly to root us in our habitual ways and make improvement difficult or impossible. The more we indulge Avidya, the stronger it becomes. Eventually, we feel that we are no longer the doer of these things; they simply happen to us. A person can attract one disastrous relationship after another, or continually experience uncontrollable rage under certain stimuli, and feel that it is nothing directly to do with them. It is just bad luck. The person fails to see that there is only one person responsible for everything that happens!
So what can we do? If Avidya obscures and clouds, it clearly must be obscuring SOMETHING. Yoga philosophy calls this something PURUSA. In the West, we know it as the "Higher Self" or "Silent Observer"; the true divine spirit that lies within each of us. The task therefore, is to bring Purusa out and live from it moment by moment. By doing this, we minimise the effects of the four forms of Avidya. A Spiritual Master is one who has completely uprooted the tree of Avidya forever and sees things as they really are. Thus, one of the names for the Buddha is "The Awakened One".
How do we increasingly live from Purusa - the highest within us? The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali suggest three methods. The first is actual practise of Yoga - both the physical postures and the breathing exercises. If this is something you feel comfortable with, it is definitely worth considering.
There are many physical and mental benefits to be gained from a regular practise of Yoga, no matter how simple. However, be sure to consult your doctor before even contemplating such a regime, especially if you are over 40 and have never done it before. Yoga should only ever be learned in the beginning from a live teacher. Books are helpful as a supplement but should never replace live tuition. Regular Yoga does progressively diminish the force of Avidya in our lives.
The second method is through self-examination. Regular contemplation of our actions and habitual thought patterns will awaken us to take increasing responsibility for our lives. Meditation is one excellent method that can help. So too can keeping a Journal of our progress. Activities like these can break the habitual stimulus-response cycle, and place that moment of choice back in between the two.
In other words, instead of responding automatically as we usually do, we can choose in that moment to act differently. We become increasingly conscious and responsible, instead of remaining creatures of habit.
The third method is to create a certain detachment to the actions of our life, and almost become an external observer. Rather than being an active participant, taking our hopes and dreams terribly seriously, we become more like an actor in a play, playing the part the best we can.
This form of spiritual detachment does not mean we under-perform in life in any way. It merely means that we become more detached and objective about the movement of our lives; less elated when things go right and less distraught when disaster occurs. In this way the ego, and indeed all aspects of Avidya, are progressively weakened.
In truth, all three methods work best together. However, one or other approach can prove immensely beneficial. For most of us, Avidya will remain to some extent throughout our lives. However, the more we can live from the true spirit within, the Purusa, the more authentically we live our lives. We relate to others better, make better decisions, and the hold of ignorance upon our lives gradually diminishes. We become the best person we can possibly be and thereby benefit the world. Surely that is the goal of life?